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Gabe is a Little Piggy

October 13, 2006

We had our second doctor’s appointment last night, and there is more good news. Gabe is now up to 5lbs, 14 ozs, so he has surpassed his birth weight and is packing it on. There seems to be nothing with jaundice to worry about, and his circumcision has healed to the point we don’t need to use vaseline on his diapers anymore. We’re still waiting for his umbilical cord stump to fall off, but it looks good, not swollen or infected whatsoever.

I’m all excited about Gabe’s gaining weight,.. but can you believe I was almost two pounds heavier when I was born? He’s still a tiny tiny baby!

I am starting to feel better, although it’s hard to tell with the sleep deprivation I’ve got going on. Not only do I have to wake up every 2-3 hours during the night to feed Gabe, but I have to wake him up to do it! The problem is that I can’t seem to relax enough to sleep when Tim isn’t here. I’m just looking forward to the weekend, when I can trust Tim with the baby for a couple of hours, and sleep uninterrupted for an afternoon.

It’s 70 degrees in the house, and I’m freezing. Is that a normal post-partum situation? Poor Timmy,… he really enjoys colder weather, and I think he’s about cooked out of his own home!

I guess I’m just really hit by baby blues,… it’s so easy for me to burst into tears over the smallest little thing. I feel a bit overwhelmed by all the responsibility a baby requires,… there really isn’t anybody else to hand the baby off to when I’m unsure about stuff. And I’m sure that’s why I’m frustrated so much,… it just feels like I’ve become a non-entity in the wake of the baby. People have offered to help, but any time I’ve asked for it since Gabe’s come, it falls through. And it’s kind of hard to feel locked up in the house,… because Gabe is so small, he’s not allowed in public. We can’t afford for him to get sick right now. I can’t drive for a couple of weeks because of the c-section. And I’m breast-feeding,… which is both the most wonderful feeling in the world (I’m providing nourishment for my son) and very nerve-wracking (am I producing enough? How can I possibly leave the house, since he could be hungry again in 5 minutes?). I just want to go to Walmart and buy a couple of cd’s,… take a nap,… have an adult conversation that doesn’t involve diapers or engorgement.

I wish I lived closer to my mom and sisters and brothers. I miss them too much.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. Jessica permalink
    October 13, 2006 9:59 am

    Who are these people who don’t come over to help… I will beat them up for you 😉

  2. Catma permalink
    October 23, 2006 11:26 am

    Oh, if I lived near by I would sit a spell and let you get out. I warned you that it could be intense. Cry when you need to and let it out. You have wonder instincts and you will be a great mother. It is natural to be scared but Tim is a great guy and you will make fine.

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